Russell Brand and Ed Miliband - what are they up to?By Editor
The impossible has finally happened. Last night, the immovable object met the unstoppable force.
I jest, of course. All that happened was that professional talker and self-proclaimed Lord of young people Russell Brand and the most charming politician the world has ever seen Ed Miliband linked up at Russ' Shoreditch home.
But what were those chumps up to? Well, we hacked Brand's emails (we didn't) and found the minutes from their encounter. Please enjoy the highlights:
Russell teaching Ed how to sext.
A three-hour stint of Dreamcast's short-lived classic, 'Ready to Rumble'.
Russell telling Ed that he coined the phrase 'Poldark and handsome'.
Prank calls to George Osborne, Jeremy Clarkson and cast members of Made in Chelsea.
Both organising a garage rave at Ed's North London townhouse (second kitchen out of bounds, however.)
Russell getting Ed on Tinder 'to put the feelers out.'
Russell convincing Ed to take part in Ninja Warrior UK.
Russell taking a snap of a shirtless Ed holding Russell’s dog to up his Tinder game.
Ed convincing Russell to vote next Thursday (topical lol.)
Russell rating the handsomeness of each prospective Labour candidate by constituency.
Ed learning about what a cereal cafe is and begging Russell to order in.
Russell trying to sell Ed his laptop with Microsoft 95 software.
Ed getting sad that he hasn't matched with anyone on Tinder.
Both taking part in a mood board (the theme of which being Christmas in the Carribean.)
Both planning a weekend break to Droitwich after the 'boring old election is over.'
Russell telling Ed that he is worth much more than 'a swipe right.'
A beautiful kiss goodbye and a promise of a better future.
If you have any tips for Ed then let us know on the socials!